Who is going to love me?

In a reflective mood, my body walked my soul down the street during my mundane, routine hours.

I began to study the faces that passed by me.  Some faces looked like stone, some had paper thin smiles where as others seemed like no one home.

 I saw a woman kiss a dog and a child cry while a mother comforted her....I had a thought that maybe everyone wonders at some point, who is going to love them?

When we know we are loved our world brightens, when we know we are loved, our challenges seem easier, when we know we are loved we find strength we didn't know we had. But can we depend on others to love us at all times?

Perhaps not... one cannot demand love.

My love of spiritual matters has often been my source of love when human love seemed dry.  Feeling a warmth from the 'other side' in a form of a sign, a vision, a dream or a message has more than once, been like a blanket of comfort.

However, as I now enter my wise woman years, it is clear to me that the most powerful love is self love. Self love is always on tap and never lets you down.  Now, when I wake in the morning, I kiss my shoulder, (mainly because I can reach it with my lips)  and I hug my body and I say 'Liz you are so special and you rock'

When I catch my reflection in the mirror, I take a moment to look in my eyes and say 'wow, you are f''ing amazing Liz' because I am. I own that now in a way I couldn't in my younger years.  Years of giving my power away to relationships, people, places and things have all taught me that the biggest love affair resides within us. 

Funnily, once we do own that self love, others seem to offer their love.

Self love is a love magnet.

Here are some guidelines and tips I took from the Queen of self love; Louise Hay;

12 Commandments to help you learn how to love yourself:

Stop All Criticism.
Criticism never changes a thing. Refuse to criticize yourself. Accept yourself exactly as you are. Everybody changes. When you criticize yourself, your changes are negative. When you approve of yourself, your changes are positive.

Forgive Yourself.
Let the past go. You did the best you could at the time with the understanding, awareness, and knowledge that you had. Now you are growing and changing, and you will live life differently.

Don’t Scare Yourself.
Stop terrorizing yourself with your thoughts. It's a dreadful way to live. Find a mental image that gives you pleasure, and immediately switch your scary thought to a pleasure thought.

Be Gentle and Kind and Patient.
Be gentle with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself as you learn the new ways of thinking. Treat yourself as you would someone you really loved.

Be Kind to Your Mind.
Self-hatred is only hating your own thoughts. Don't hate yourself for having the thoughts. Gently change your thoughts.

Praise Yourself.
Criticism breaks down the inner spirit. Praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. Tell yourself how well you are doing with every little thing.

Support Yourself.
Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends and allow them to help you. It is being strong to ask for help when you need it.

Be Loving to Your Negatives.
Acknowledge that you created them to fulfill a need. Now you are finding new, positive ways to fulfill those needs. So lovingly release the old negative patterns.

Take Care of Your Body.
Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need in order to have optimum energy and vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise do you enjoy? Cherish and revere the temple you live in.

Do Mirror Work.
Look into your eyes often. Express this growing sense of love you have for yourself. Forgive yourself while looking into the mirror. Talk to your parents while looking into the mirror. Forgive them, too. At least once a day, say, "I love you, I really love you!"

Love Yourself . . . Do It Now.
Don't wait until you get well, or lose the weight, or get the new job, or find the new relationship. Begin now—and do the best you can.'

Louise L Hay

No need to wait for love to come to you, its already there, in you!

 Self hugs all round! 

I Think I Can

I think it's going to be a great year...I think it is going to rain...I think she is stupid....I think I will always be broke....I think he loves me....think ....we think, I think, you think, we all think!

We use this term so flippantly often each day without really thinking about it. Perhaps this is the problem...what we think sets the boundaries for our experiences. What we believe to be true is the message we give ourselves and the universe.

I know it is almost common knowledge these days that we manifest our own reality and this attitude mirrors our part in the bigger scheme of things which in many ways is brilliant.  It helps us to take responsibility and stop playing the blame game.

But why is it that although we accept our part and become aware we are often creating our own reality while simultaneously being brain dead about it on a moment to moment basis?

'Yea, I know I create my own reality, by the way 'I hate how my work brings me down', 'I hate that I am broke' 'Why is she being so nasty to me?' DING DING.....HELLO....warning, we just THOUGHT our future by affirming we are broke, unhappy or mistreated.  We still have a long way to go.  Action coupled with our understanding is powerful.

So what is the solution?  For me, it is in those special moments when I catch those thoughts being born. Part of me is on the outside looking in and identifies them.  Not all the time, but sometimes.  Then, I have the power to delete those thoughts and recreate new ones.  'I am broke' becomes; 'I am abundant'. 'No one loves me' become'; 'I am lovable'. 'I can't get a job' becomes;  'I attract my dream job' and so on.

As we hurtle through this new century, it seems that thought equals manifestations quicker than ever before, not sure why but I know that it's happening.  Time to take our awareness to the next level, that is, our self awareness.  Know thyself and know that those dumb thoughts don't serve us and we can choose to toss them. They, these dumb thoughts, have to become the exception and live in the peripherals of our lives, not the mainstream so that we can see them when they rear their ugly heads. 

We can then choose to replace them with positive energy and watch our lives bloom, grow and expand. 

We only have one life, well maybe millions, but right here, right now, is all we have.  Let's make it powerful, fun, enlightening and yummy.  

You and I have the power ! YEAH!

Past Lives and a Wardrobe of Outfits.

In November last year, as our airport bus transfer stopped to pick up fresh passengers, my friend Anne and I tried hard to keep our eyes open. We had been awake for around 25 hours after getting transfers, waiting at LA Airport for hours and flying back to Brisbane from LA.

Me and my friend Anne, who was brilliant traveling companion

We woke up really quickly as the bus began to permeate the worst body odor we had ever encountered. The two girls in front of us covered their noses with tissues politely but in our delirious state we began laughing, we thought it was the most hilarious thing that had ever happened. A quick glance around the small bus revealed a young man sitting at the back looking slightly embarrassed. As I turned back to my friend I exploded into uncontrollable laughter as she had two scented wet cloths stuck up her nose..with a devilish smile on her face. It really was bad and perhaps the bus will never recover. (for any Seinfeld fans reading this, you will recall an episode that had this theme)  Being human and having a body to care for is obviously too much for some of us sometimes!

I had a wonderful time in LA. The conference we went to the 'I Can Do It ' was an inspiring event hosted by Hay House and I had a great time doing my first book signing for my book 'For the Love of Spirit'

Me at the book signing in Pasadena for my book 'For the Love of Spirit"

 We connected with some lovely people and I guess my highlight was re connecting with the amazing Denise Linn and her daughter, Meadow as well as seeing Louise Hay, Doreen Virtue and being introduced to the power of 'Tapping' with Nick Ortner.

On top of that I saw Beverly Hills, the Hollywood Hills, Rodeo Drive, Malibu and movie star houses, and I loved every minute of it. We ate in a celebrity restaurant, The Ivy, in Beverly Hills, ate incredible food and paid $90 for a bottle of wine by accident but loved every drop and again, laughed ourselves silly.

However, something else happened to me there, I breathed, sensed and felt L.A. Perhaps not just L.A but the land of the US itself, I somehow absorbed the energy there and my intuition told me I had somewhere, sometime been there before. I felt a connection deeper than the obvious surroundings, I felt a connection to the earth and the land there.

Me with the gorgeous Denise Linn and her beautiful daughter Meadow Linn

How many of you have felt that in a certain location ? Many of you I am sure.  It got me thinking about our souls, our personalities and our bodies.  Maybe when we are in the Spirit World, we have a wardrobe full of different outfits, maybe we are made of light and before we come to earth we go to the wardrobe and choose an outfit. Mmm.... will I play the role of the Native American Indian, the outback Aussie, a homeless person, a devout religious Nun or perhaps a nobody from the suburbs this time, what do I need to learn, what outfit is most appropriate?  All the time we are the same soul.

One question that I get asked repeatedly in my work is this one; 'If my loved one has died and re incarnated, how can they come through in a medium reading?'

Well, first of all I am not God of any sort, so who the heck knows for sure, but one of my theories is that there is no linear time as we know it. Linear time is an illusion and if that is true, the past present and future are all one. So, if your loved one has reincarnated, you can still tap into them on a timeless type of connection.

And in the end love is the power that bonds us and separation is an illusion. If someone you love has already made their transition to the other side and you loved them and they loved you, it is my firm belief that you cannot lose them through the ethereal layers, it's true they remain in your heart in a very real way.

So the message of this post? Laugh, live and trust where you feel connected and know that love is truly your ticket to a never ending story, that being life itself.

Letting Go of Outcomes

As I drove along a bendy road in the lush green bush, the afternoon sun was gently filtering through the damp forest roadside trees. The familiar hum of my car was strangely comforting as it was practically driving itself home and I found myself thinking about decisions I need to make. Things happening in my children's lives, my husbands life, my mother's life, worrying about this situation, that possibility and then, out of the blue........there was a moment, there was an epiphany....what if I just accepted everything that is happening in my life completely as it is...as okay...warts and all?

My conscious experience always seems in the middle of something, looking for an end, a completion and in the meantime I am often missing the middle, the journey because I am wanting to fix this, change that and do something differently and all too often, I want to control the outcome.

But....what if....everything as it is in this moment is okay, is perfect, although it may be unfinished, unclear, unsure and uncertain how it will end up...to find that level of contentment without pushing, pulling and trying to make an outcome happen.....when I  arrive at that space in myself,  there is a sense of peace that is so sweet.  I think it is called 'trust'

The outcome of any given situation may be so much better than we plan if we give it a bit of room to just be, to just breathe.  The universe has a way of knowing us better than we know ourselves including what we need.

One affirmation I heard from Louise Hay has been firmly planted in my mind. 'Life Loves Us' and I believe it does.  Life will often provide a doorway, an opportunity or a twist in our paths that we would never have imagined and often better than we imagined.

Whatever is happening in our lives, it will change, change is guaranteed.  We have to make the choice are we going to buy into the stress of future outcomes that haven't yet occurred or are we going to learn to trust our intuition, think positively and trust the universe is there to support us?

As we now enter a new year, our enthusiasm about the future is at a high peak, which can only be a good thing for the collective consciousness so let's take advantage of that and move forward with faith and positivity.

My affirmation for the new year is;  'Everything is working out perfectly'

May your 2014 be absolutely amazing where you break barriers, jump hurdles with ease and feel more love than you ever felt possible.  Remember, life loves you!

Beauty of the Green Eyed Monster

I am dysfunctional, I always have been, I grew up in a dysfunctional family and a dysfunctional society...so why  is there a compulsion within me at times to prove to others that I'm functional? It seems we all, at times, delight in being able to skite about a so called 'functional' situation or a choice that we made;  eg; 'I exercise at least five times a week'  'My child was top of the class, again' or something like 'My partner is so amazing'  Even those of us who think we are enlightened at times succumb to the need for approval from society at large. This form of communication is a breeding ground for us to focus on lack in our lives through comparison.

Recently, I found myself having pangs of  envy and resentment. Part of me was on the outside looking in and I saw it, clear as day and it made me laugh. OMG Liz, you are definitely feeling envy...my curious mind wanted to analyze this.  I was resentful of the successful author who seemed so supported after I have spent a small fortune self publishing with so far, little return.  I was resentful of the parents who have seemingly perfect children while my kids eat Pizza staring at a computer screen.  I was resentful of the couple who had payed off their mortgage by the time they were 30 where as my husband and I will be 70 something by the time we pay ours off......STOP....I said to myself...what is going on here, what is it that your soul is trying to tell you?

I meditated and slowly the answers came...I began to untangle the emotions and feelings behind the reaction to each situation. 

 I have felt largely unsupported being a self published, first time author, yet I have the power to choose to shift that attitude....my new affirmation is; 'I am constantly supported in my work as a writer.'  I need to believe that in a deep way rather than play the victim because resentment  and envy has 'victim' written all over it.

My kids are who they are ... they aren't perfect human beings and neither am I...I don't need to measure their success by comparing them to other children or societies standards.  The 'perfect' children have their stuff too, I am sure.

I am lucky to have a mortgage! You  can not take a house with you when you die whether you own it or not

I felt grateful I was able to recognize my resentment as it was a pointer to where I needed to shift some attitudes.  Owning our more difficult emotions can be huge hint to where we need to shift and realign so that we can more fully enjoy our lives.

Where or when do you feel resentment or envy and what story can it tell you that will help you to live with more love and light in your life?  After all, love is all that matters in the end and  'it's not fair' attitudes will rob us of time that  is never repeated.  So today I remind myself to live my life outside the cage by using the power of choice.  

What is in our hearts?

Once I sat in a spiritual group where the leader of the group was a sound therapist.  I wasn't very open at the time, I was highly suspicious of this woman who spontaneously would break out into guttural type sounds that made me want to laugh and run all at once.  To top it off she said that Jesus was her spirit guide and to be honest I decided then and there she was a kook and I would just sit and suffer the next hour or so.

Closed down and switched off, what happened next surprised me.  She began to come to each individual in the group and sing over our heads while waving her hands around the crown of each of our heads.  She explained that whatever is in our hearts, truly in our hearts...is reflected in the crown chakra.  Then she gave us each a message.

I observed as she passed messages to the others and watched their faces light up in recognition.
When she came to me and sang her eerie song over my head, my fists clenched. I felt exposed and naked.  She said; 'Nature is in your heart, you can't live without it and I see you living in the country and in this house you will find much inner peace'  
Uncannily, at that time, my husband and I were trying to close a long, drawn out deal on a house in the country.  This woman was absolutely correct, we got the house and I still live there now.  The time I have been here I have felt a strong sense of peace.

Sitting here now I wonder how I can work out what's in my heart based on her method...so I sit quietly where no one is around....I place my hands on the top of my head, take a few breaths and I pray; 'Dear Spirit' what is in my heart right now?  After a while of sitting and waiting, I see a visual in my mind of myself meditating and praying. Then, I see myself writing.  I hear the words 'write about your passion, write about what moves you'  I feel relieved because lately, being so engaged in commitments and responsibilities, I have been doubting my direction with writing. 

 If you're game, give it a go, you may learn what is in your heart.

Many times I have wished I could remember the name of this woman so I could thank her. She has no idea that she taught me so much. My arrogance that day almost robbed me of a precious moment of wisdom and insight.

Moral of the story? Just because someone may be acting like a fool, it doesn't mean they are one, look for the gift in each other.

Dealing with our Inner Angst

 

Oh my god, oh my god, perhaps I have Cancer, what if I fail, perhaps they don't like me, what will people think,  perhaps my loved one will die and what will happen to me...what if I collapse on my own and no one knows, what if I get mugged or murdered.....these are the ramblings my mind has gone on about quite often, particularly when I am feel fatigued, flat or burnt out.  Fear is part of life and it seems and anxiety is at an all time high.  It can be debilitating. 

Many years ago, after an awful car accident and a marriage breakdown that happened around the same time, I suffered huge anxiety attacks that always happened in the car. My psychologist said at the time that in my head I had strung two unpleasant experiences together and decided that driving a car was dangerous.  It took me ten years until I could confidently drive a car anywhere.  I tried all the usual recommendations but nothing seemed to work.

Emergency Essence healed my anxiety

Around the ninth year I started taking 'Emergency Essence' from the Australian Bush Flower range two or three times a day.  It is similar to 'Rescue Remedy' in the Bach Flower Essences range.  This particular combination is for shock, panic, distress and fear.  The positive outcome of taking the essence is to give one the ability to cope. As it says on the website;  http://ausflowers.com.au/

'Excellent for any emotional upset. It has a calming effect during a crisis. If a person needs specialised medical help, this Essence will provide comfort until treatment is available. Administer this remedy every hour or more frequently if necessary, until the person feels better.'
(The flower essences in this mix are; Angelsword, Crowea, Dog Rose of the Wild Forces, Fringed Violet, Grey Spider Flower, Sundew and Waratah.)

Generally this essence is for an 'Emergency' but I felt guided to take it like an anti depressant and I did so daily and after around six months I started to feel like I could drive a bit further without having an anxiety attack. To my relief I was able to drive anywhere without incident from that time on and I have remained free of attacks ever since.  I still get anxious like many of us at times and I always carry emergency essence on me and it always takes the edge off and calms me down.  Even earlier this year after an adverse reaction to a tick bite, the emergency essence on the way to the hospital calmed me considerably. I highly recommend it, it is inexpensive and available in most health food shops and also online for around $10.

I believe when we feel anxiety we become ungrounded and our Spirit is knocked out of our body and that is why we often feel light headed when anxious. Our base chakra located at the base of our spine goes out of alignment when suffering anxiety and the flower essences work on our energy bodies as well as our conscious bodies. Conscious deep breathing can be helpful during an anxiety attack because it also brings us back into our bodies. Focusing on something around us also helps as it brings us into the now.  Focus on a picture on the wall or a tree nearby, breathe it in and bring yourself back to the present.

Fear and anxiety robs us of  quality of life, prevents us discovering more about ourselves and limits our experiences in the short time we are here. 

With the fast tracked pace of modern life it's important we develop stress management that works for us.  Know ourselves.  Perhaps for you physical exercise is your remedy or a walk in the park or a chat to a friend.  For me its my bush flowers, meditation and praying to Archangel Michael, the best trouble shooting angel to call on. Positive affirmations, extra rest and a good diet makes a huge difference to me also. 

I  have learned that I can't watch violent movies either, it feeds my fear.

 What ever works for you, find out what it is so that you can enjoy your life more fully, at the end of the day and the end of our lives we want to know we made the most of our precious time here.